Because I Said So!!! Mom Knows Best!

I am a 40 year young woman with loads of dreams and only a 50
percent follow-through rate. I grew up in Royal Oak Michigan and currantly live
in te Detroit suburb of Eastpointe Michigan. A mid-sized, cultrially diverse town
that borders Detroit.
I am the only daughter of an only daughter and spent the first 12 years of
my life living with my Grandparents on my mothers side. I went to Catholic School through
5th grade where my Grandmother was a school teacher and my Grandfather worked for
Ford Moter Company. I was well traveled as a child and have been just about everywhere since
at a young age I had the advantage of living with two retired caregivers who loved to travel.
We also had a summer house on Black Lake in Northern Michigan where I have some of my
best memories.
When I was 12 I went to live with my mother who worked for the Huntington Woods Police
Department and ended up going through quiet a few years of turmoil. In hindsight I realize she
never fully grew up herself and it was the immature leading the immature and by the time I was 15
I was in Foster care after spending a few years in various youth programs. By 17 I was living on my
own and working fulltime and have to give a lot of props to my Foster Parents for helping me
find my way and put me on a path to becomming whole. They even helped my with the setback of loosing my Grandfather.
I spent a few years as a crazy independant youth who enjoyed my friends, social life and job. I loved
working in Resturaunts and decided that was what I wanted to do with my life. I worked my way through
school and just about when I was about to take a giant step on the corporate ladder I met my sons father
and found myself pregnate at 24. Determined to not repeat the mistake my parents made I choose not
to get married against my Grandmothers loud advice and on October 28th in 1993 I became a mother
of a healthy 7 pound nine ounce boy I named Andrew.
I went back to work when he was 3 months old and within a month knew I missed him so much I could not stand
being away from him and decided to open a home based daycare where I could be with my son and still be able
to pay my bills. I took all the state classes and turned my basement into a daycare and spent the next two years
being a part of my sons life every day. I also became single again. This happened about the same time
one of my best friends became single so she moved in with me and we did our Kate and Alley take on
the world for the next year or so. I miss that time period for I truely had it all right then, my son, my friend,
a nice place to live and lots of hope for the future.
After two years I went back into my field of choice and loved my job as much as I loved my son though
the hours could have been a lot better. I also bought my first house and found out I had champainge tastes on
a beer budget and learned the ins and outs of being frugal. In the next few years I learned home matiance, car repairs,
coupon, dopuble coupon, thrif stores and all about sales. Though I had to work I also made sure my
son got to experiance some of the travel experiances I did and we managed to take two really great vacations
a year. Things could not have been better and even though I was without a man in my life I did
have my son and looked forward to each new day!
For the next five years or so everything was awesome and even though my son was diagnosed with
ADHD I chose not to medicate him he kept me going with his antics and I realized what a clever child I had.
My carreer was also going strong.
In 1999 the bottom fell out of my world with the death of my Grandmother for she truely was
the glue that held our family together. My mother and my strained relationship grew even worse and
I was tired of not finding my Prince Charming and dropped out of the world so to speak for a while.
I was also diagnosed with Arthritus in my spine and just when I found my carreer at its strongest
I found my body at its weakest and needed to refocus my life. I did some free-lance writing and
had a few childrens works published and knew I needed to go back to school to find a new carrer path
that would see me through the future.
A few years ago I ran across a man I have known for many years and he had also been single for a while
and we started spending time together. Last year I found out I needed a hysterectomy and even though
I did not plan on more children I was still saddened over this. A month or so before it was scheduled I went to
my doctor for I was feeling ill and found out I was pregnate. WOW!! I was 39 with a 15 year old son and
just about passed out on the floor in the doctors office. All he could do was laugh for he also got to
inform me that not only would a pregnacy fix what was wrong with me I would be extra fertile after the
childs birth.
John and I had a baby girl last July after a very ruff pregnacy. She was induced a week early and spent
the first week of her life in NICU but has now made up for lost time and keeps us very busy. She is also
the apple of her 16 year old brothers eye who always wanted a brother or sister. She is my pride and joy right now.
Even though I do not have the energy I had with my son I now have more patiance and feel
I am more savey. I enjoy everything she does on a whole differant level than I did my son and take
pride in everything she does. I feel after all these years I have learned what is important and what is
not and how to let the trivial slide off my back and hole onto the good points. I am also amazed at the
strides they have made in child rearing aids since my son was little all those years ago and can reflect on
what was good for him and what is good for her with wonder and amazement. I feel blessed that I
can compair the two and have been given a rare first hand glimpse at progress in motion.
Every day from now on will be an adventure for all of us and baby Rowan is at the center of it!