Because I Said So!!! Mom Knows Best!

John is just inept when it comes to
a massage. There is never the right pressure for
he thinks he is going to hurt me. No matter how
much I reassure him it stays the same. It has
gotten to the point where I don't even bother to
ask anymore for whats the point? If you don't
enjoy something I am not one to go through the
motions. It is a shame too for a simple body
massage almost always leads to a whole different
scenario and it is a great way to break the ice
and relax one another.
There is nothing that makes me feel
more amorous then a full body massage that
leaves me feeling like Jello and so relaxed I
can feel it in my bones. After a hard day of
baby rearing and housework and even when
I was working out of the house I really need
that break. I did buy one of those chairs that
has the vibrating balls that roll up and down
the back and I have to admit that the pressure
is right there but I walk away feeling like I
was molested by a piece of furniture.
When the Adult toy shop asked if
I would do a review for them I jumped at the
chance to try their Kama Sutra Line. I don't know
if you are familiar with the line but they have everything
from oils to Honey Dust to body paints and Pleasure
balm. Everything about Kama Sutra is for helping
you relax and enjoy the moment. Kama Sutra itself
is an old Hindi word that means love manual and
they believed that the act of making love is one of
the three aims of life right along with Virtue and
Prosperity. Love is supposed to be something you
are relaxed about and enjoy.
There are also other benefits to massage,
such as it promotes healing, boosts your immune
system, helps with circulation and even used for
Depression and Anxiety. I have lower back pain that
is a killer and there is nothing better then a good
massage to ease the pain and tension that lives in
my muscles. It is even used to help pre-term infants
gain weight and provide a sense of well-being
to your baby. What could be better?
When the kit came yesterday I had to drag
John into it kicking and screaming. He knows
he gives a lousy massage and though I never tell
him he needs a lot of work in that department
I am sure he is aware that being afraid of doing
something just increases the odds you don't do
it very well. By the time I cornered him and slammed
the massage oil kit on the counter he knew I meant
business. I did him first and by the time I was finished
he was relaxed enough to give it the old collage try.
The oil made it much easier for John for his hands
glided over my back and soon how much pressure
he was applying was forgotten and he he enjoyed
giving the massage. The aroma of the oil itself
is relaxing and add some soft music and a candle
and before long you could not even tell this was
a man who quiet possibly gave the worst back
massage in the history of man. Now he was a
professional.

Anyone who is bestowed the title
"Mom or Dad" knows that with that
honor you have to relinquish your
rights to personal time.






Forget wandering through the mall
in search of the perfect shoe. You now
have 15 minutes to find a shoe that fits
good and doesn't mind the occasional
coating of Apple Sauce or Grape Juice!
Forget Thursday night bowling with the
guys. The only strike Dad now sees is
the strike his 12 year old daughter goes
on when she wants a raise in her
allowance.






Tender, Romantic, Moonlit walks on
the Beach while holding hands?



Right!



That one is still available, sorta. It's
only now described as Dad shaking the
sand out of the 2 year olds shoes while
Mom tenderly pyre's the sucker out of his
hair the 5 year old left for safe keeping
and the 10 year old flicks the light on and
off as fast as he can to see if things really
do move in slow motion.






Mom and Dad spending hours in bed
remembering why they fell in love in the
first place?


Forget about it!



I might be able to pencil you in for
five minutes in June of 2011. Mom's
and Dad's know you have to take it when
you can get it and that isn't very often.
You better make it good!






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significant other had a Romantic dinner
together.The contest will start today, December
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Extra entries.
Extra entries only count after the initial entry
is completed.






1. Become a follower of my blog or
post that you are. 3 entries,
please post 3 times.






2. Enter any of my other contest. I entry
per contest, separate post for each entry.



3. Grab my button. 5 entries. Please post
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LINK TO SITE






http://www.toydemon.com/

DON"T FORGET TO ENTER THE TOY DEMON CONTEST




I grew up in a highly religious and
very strict house . Part of that mindset
is no touching. Our house was a very "hands
off house", right down the the separate twin
beds my Grandparents slept in. What this led
to with me is I am a person who needs lots of
personal space and feel crowded and uncomfortable
with the "touchers!"



I also had the sense enough to understand
the too little touching is just as unhealthy as
too much touching and knew I could not raise
my child to be the same way as me. With
family dynamics like that people have to
work hard to change the mindset and make
an everyday conscience effort. Everyday
I made sure to tell me son Loved him and
give him at least one hug. I know these sound
like everyday things and should come Natural
but they are only natural if that is the way you
were raised and was not so for me it was work.


16 years later I can proudly say he
is fine with Physical contact though I still struggle.
The funny part now is even though he is not an
"Over -Toucher" he can still make me uncomfortable
at times and leave me feeling crowded. Now that
I have a new daughter I have to start the process
over again and wanted to do some research
to verify if the feeling I had that such a hands-off
approach to raising kids really was unhealthy.
Here is what I found.



People who grow up in environments without
touching are less compassionate. Things do
not affect people that grow up this was as
they would other people. A simple shoulder
squeeze displays a connection that when
with held does not allow the person to
emphasize with other people.



They are also more emotionally
Isolate. When you grow up in a world
like that you tend to keep not only
your body parts but your feelings to
yourself.



People that grow up without
basic physical contact end up having
a hard time later in life distinguishing
the difference between appropriate
contact and in- appropriate. This can
leave them open to molestation or
other forms of abuse.



Last of all it can leave them emotionally
stunted. How can you grow as a person
when you do not experience the full
spectrum of feelings? Stoicism is not
the only feeling out there and people
who feel the need to segregate themselves
will often stop their emotional growth at
that phase and not move past it.




Studies have shown that even Babies
react to peoples expressions and posturing
and this tells us that a comfort level with
ones own self starts at an early age. I had
to try this one out myself and both my son
and I saw Rowan in her high chair and made
frowning faces. Soon she was ready to cry
so we started smiling. Giggles abound.
Rowan can already read our moods and
models hers after the people who care
for her. There for it is very important not
to swing the pendulum to far in either way.
To teach your child what is appropriate
touching or not start early. When she needs
comfort, hug them and smile. Let them know
comfort comes with Love. If you are a person
who has children and a hard time with physical
contact make sure that when they get older
to explain the difference between correct contact
and inappropriate. Don't assume they "know"
because you do.



Try to give your older Children pats
on the back or a shoulder squeeze. They
may squirm and wriggle away but they
subconsciously get the message you care
about them. Let your loved one or Significant
other know your boundaries but try to
entertain theirs as well. Give them a massage
once in a while or practice other forms of
intimacy outside your comfort level to let
them know you are working on increasing
yours if they scale back theirs a little.
Verbal communication does wonders as
well for people tend to believe it is them
when you shrug away or tense up when
they embrace you. All in all know
your boundaries but don't cement them
in stone, teach your children to be
more then you are and make sure to
include you partner in your comfort zone.
After all you will be together a life time,
develop healthy habits now!


Hey guys, don't forget to enter the Toy Demon Contest!